When grief involves trauma − a social worker explains how to support survivors of the recent floods and other devastating losses
The July 4, 2025, floods in Kerr County, Texas, swept away children and entire families, leaving horror in their wake. Days later, flash floods struck Ruidoso, New Mexico, killing three people, including two young children. These are not just devastating losses. When death is sudden, violent, or when a body is never recovered, grief gets tangled up with trauma. In these situations, people don’t only grieve the death. They struggle with the terror of how it happened, the unanswered questions and the shock etched into their bodies. I’m a social work professor, grief researcher and the founder of The Young Widowhood Project, a research initiative aimed at expanding scholarship and public understanding of premature spousal loss. I was widowed when I was 36. In July 2020, my husband, Brent, went missing after testing a small, flat-bottomed fishing boat called a Jon boat. His body was recovered two days later, but I never saw his remains. Both my personal loss and professional work have shown me how trauma changes the grieving process and what kind of support actually helps. To understand how trauma can complicate grief, it’s important to first understand how people typically respond to loss.
Grief isn’t a set of stages
Many people still think of grief through the lens of psychiatrist Dr. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross’ five stages of grief, popularized in the early 1970s: denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. But in fact, this model was originally designed for people facing their own deaths, not for mourners. In the absence of accessible grief research in the 1960s, it became a leading framework for understanding the grieving process – even though it wasn’t meant for that. Despite this misapplication, the stages model has shaped cultural expectations: namely, that grief ends once people reach the “acceptance” stage. But research doesn’t support this idea. Trying to force grief into this model can cause real harm, leaving mourners feeling they’re grieving “wrong.” In reality, mourning is often lifelong. Most people go through an acute period of overwhelming pain right after the loss. This is usually followed by integrated grief, where the pain softens but the loss is still part of everyday life, returning in waves. Although grief is unique to each person and relationship, researchers have found that mourners often strive to a) make sense of the death; b) adjust to a world without their loved one; c) form an ongoing connection with their deceased loved one in new ways; and d) figure out who they are without their loved one. It’s difficult and at times disorienting work, but most people find ways to carry their grief and keep living.Julia Mora embraces her granddaughter, Isla Meyer, during a vigil for Texas flood victims on July 11, 2025.AP Photo/Gerald Herbert
When grief and trauma collide
However, some losses carry an extra layer of pain, confusion and trauma. Sudden, unexpected, accidental, violent or deeply tragic deaths – like those experienced during the recent floods – can lead to what researchers call traumatic bereavement: grief that is disrupted by the traumatic nature of the death. People experiencing traumatic bereavement often endure a longer and more intense acute grief period. They may be haunted by disturbing images, nightmares or relentless thoughts about how their loved one died or suffered. Many wrestle with dread, spiritual disorientation and a shattered sense of safety in the world. Some of these deaths are also considered “ambiguous” – unclear or unconfirmed loss – such as when a body is never recovered or is too damaged to view. Without physical confirmation, mourners often feel stuck in disbelief and helplessness. This was true in my case. Not seeing my husband’s body left a part of me suspended between knowing and not knowing. I knew he had died but couldn’t fully believe it, no matter how much I lived with the reality of his absence. For a long time, I caught myself repeating these words every morning: “Brent is dead. Brent is dead.” In many cases, these reactions aren’t short term. Many people affected by traumatic loss remain overwhelmed and sometimes physically and emotionally impaired for years. Symptoms may taper over time, but they rarely disappear entirely.
Supporting mourners
Traumatic bereavement can feel unbearable. Many mourners struggle with intense, long-lasting reactions that can leave them feeling helpless, altered or even unrecognizable to themselves. They may appear withdrawn, forgetful or emotionally drained because their systems are overwhelmed. Coping can look messy or self-destructive, but these are often survival strategies, not conscious choices. I’ve also seen how those same struggles become more survivable when mourners don’t have to carry them alone. If you’re supporting someone through traumatic loss, here are three ways to help.
Make space for the horror. Listen without flinching. Acknowledge the full weight of what happened and how terrifying and unjust the loss was. This means saying things like, “This should never have happened,” or “What you went through is beyond words.” It means staying present when the mourner speaks about what haunts them. Let them know they don’t have to carry this alone. You may feel the urge to say something hopeful such as, “At least the body was recovered,” but there is no silver lining in these cases. Instead, say: “There’s nothing I can say to fix this, but I’m not going anywhere.”
Help them find others who can understand. Trauma can be isolating. Mourners often feel uniquely overwhelmed or confused. Support groups, peer companions and therapists trained in treating grief and trauma can offer the kind of recognition and validation that even the most devoted friend may not be able to provide.
Take care of yourself, too. Being present for someone in deep grief takes energy, especially if you were personally affected by the loss. Stay connected to replenishing people, practices and routines. If you don’t, you may begin to experience trauma, too. Taking care of yourself will help you remain grounded so that you can show up.
I believe supporting someone through traumatic bereavement is one of the most meaningful things you can do. You don’t need perfect words or a plan. What sustains them won’t be advice or solutions, but your simple, powerful act of staying. Liza Barros-Lane, Assistant Professor of Social Work, University of Houston-Downtown This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.
In September 2024, Miami Dolphins star Tyreek Hill found himself at the center of a controversy that spread across social media, sparked national debate, and triggered an internal investigation inside the Miami-Dade Police Department (MDPD). More than a year later, many fans still wonder what actually happened that day — and whether Hill ever moved forward with legal action. Here’s a clear breakdown of the incident and the current status of the case.
The Traffic Stop That Sparked Outrage
On the morning of September 8, 2024 — just hours before the Dolphins’ season opener — Hill was pulled over near Hard Rock Stadium for alleged careless driving and a seat-belt violation. What followed was a violent escalation that shocked fans and critics alike.
Body-cam and bystander video footage released shortly after the incident showed officers pulling Hill from his vehicle, forcing him to the ground, placing a knee on his back, and handcuffing him. Hill later said he complied with commands and didn’t understand why the encounter became so aggressive.
The videos went viral almost instantly, raising widespread concerns about excessive force, bias in traffic stops, and how police interact with high-profile Black athletes.
A Police Officer With a History of Complaints
The MDPD later identified the officer who forcibly removed Hill from the vehicle as Danny Torres — a 27-year veteran of the department. Records revealed Torres had a long disciplinary history, including multiple suspensions for issues such as improper procedures, force violations, discourtesy, and body-camera failures.
Following public backlash, MDPD placed Torres on administrative duty pending an internal-affairs investigation. As of the latest updates, the department has not released final findings or announced disciplinary action beyond that initial administrative reassignment.
Traffic Citations Dismissed — But Not Because Hill Was Innocent or Guilty
In November 2024, Hill’s traffic tickets were officially dismissed — not because the court ruled in Hill’s favor, but because the officers who issued the citations didn’t show up in court. Without the officers present to testify, the judge dropped the case due to “lack of prosecution.”
The dismissal frustrated Hill’s legal team, who argued it showed a lack of accountability within the department. The MDPD later stated that an officer’s absence from court “does not indicate the citation lacked merit.”
Did Tyreek Hill Sue the Miami-Dade Police Department?
Short answer: No — at least not yet, and not publicly.
Hill’s legal team has repeatedly said they were exploring “every legal remedy,” including a potential civil-rights lawsuit (often filed federally under Section 1983). But after extensive research through public court records and news archives, there is no evidence that Hill has filed a federal or state civil lawsuit against MDPD or any of its officers.
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If a lawsuit had been filed, it likely would have generated major media coverage — especially given Hill’s profile and the viral nature of the incident. Instead, all reporting continues to describe Hill’s legal posture as “considering,” “evaluating,” or “preparing,” not filing.
Why the Case Remains Unresolved
Several factors may explain why the legal process remains in limbo:
Internal affairs reviews take time — and MDPD has not publicly concluded its investigation. Hill’s legal team may be waiting for the department’s findings before proceeding. Negotiations or private discussions between attorneys and the county may be occurring behind the scenes. A lawsuit could still be filed at any time if Hill’s team decides to move forward.
Without public filings, official disciplinary announcements, or new footage, the case remains in a holding pattern.
The Bigger Picture
The Tyreek Hill incident resurfaces bigger questions about policing, transparency, and accountability. The videos of Hill’s detainment reignited debates familiar to many Americans: When does a routine traffic stop become unnecessarily violent? Why aren’t officers held accountable when they fail to appear in court? And how do prior disciplinary issues go unaddressed for years?
While Hill returned to the field that same day — even mocking the handcuffs in a now-famous touchdown celebration — the impact of the incident still lingers in Miami and the NFL community.
What to Watch For Next
Here’s what could happen going forward:
MDPD may eventually release the internal-affairs findings. The county could impose discipline or policy changes based on the investigation. Hill’s legal team may file a civil-rights lawsuit. The case could appear in federal or state court if filings become public.
Until then, the situation remains officially unresolved, with more questions than answers.
For more information on the Tyreek Hill incident, see the following sources:
Delivering What Matters! This holiday season, give gifts that matter. Support UNICEF’s mission to deliver essentials like nutrition, education, and shelter to children worldwide through meaningful charitable giving.
(Family Features) As families prepare for the holidays, presents and packages fill doorsteps seemingly on demand. For millions of children around the world, however, each delivery carries more than convenience – it carries purpose. For example, UNICEF continues its lifesaving work, delivering essentials like nutrition, shelter and warm clothes to children who need it most. From Sudan to Ukraine, Gaza to Malawi and beyond, the organization delivers more than just supplies – it provides a hopeful future for children around the world. When conflict unfolds, when disaster strikes or when the winter cold hits, the organization’s critical aid is never out of reach, even for the world’s hardest-to-reach children. This holiday season, give a gift that matters. With UNICEF Market and Inspired Gifts, you can bring education and lifesaving tools to children around the world. An Art Therapy Kit can give children an outlet needed to heal while a Math Classroom Kit can open doors to brighter futures. Through The K.I.N.D. Fund – now celebrating its 15th anniversary – you can support education in Malawi by providing children with desks and scholarships to help kids go beyond elementary school learning levels. You can send Essential Winter Kits – filled with clothing – to ensure children stay safe through the cold months. Every gift fuels the mission of pursuing a more equitable world for every child. These partner gift ideas also support the organization’s global work: Your Marriott Bonvoy points can protect and care for children worldwide. From Dec. 2-9, the travel company will match five points for every point members donate to philanthropic partners, up to 25 million total points. Furthermore, members who earn 50 or 75 qualifying nights in a calendar year are eligible to select UNICEF to benefit from their Annual Choice Benefit with a $100 USD donation. Learn more at giving.marriott.com. Give the gift of holiday radiance with The Serum by Clé de Peau Beauté. Whether you are treating yourself or a loved one, this gift is sure to spread some cheer. Since 2019, the brand has proudly donated $14.5 million total to UNICEF to support girls’ education and empowerment around the world. Find out how you can help unlock the power of girls at cledepeaubeaute.com. To help tackle the stigma around poor mental health and provide support for children, young people and caregivers globally, Jo Malone London will donate a minimum of 70% of the recommended retail price from each Charity Home Candle sold to the U.S. Fund for UNICEF with a commitment to raise at least $200,000 from July 1, 2025 by June 30, 2026. For more information, visit jomalone.com. Children of the world are too often at risk, exposed to conflicts, diseases and natural disasters that threaten their safety and well-being. Since 2016, Louis Vuitton has helped protect these children through its partnership with UNICEF. Each year, the brand creates a dedicated Silver Lockit collection in support of UNICEF’s work, and more than $24 million has been donated through this initiative. For 2025, a new design was created in collaboration with House Ambassador and UNICEF Korea Goodwill Ambassador Felix. Engraved with the word “DREAM,” representing every child’s right to grow, live and learn in a nurturing environment with access to education, health care and protection. For each piece purchased, $100-200 will be donated to help deliver life-saving assistance and education to children in urgent need around the world. Learn more at us.louisvuitton.com. Visit unicefusa.org/stories/delivering-vital-supplies-children-who-need-them-most to learn more and deliver what matters most to children this holiday season. SOURCE:UNICEF
Stories of Change: People Making a Difference
Discover inspiring stories of changemakers making a positive impact. Explore videos and articles of people tackling today’s biggest challenges with action and hope. Visit: https://stmdailynews.com/stories-of-change/
Holiday Assist 2025: Assistory Outreach Services Distributes 400 Thanksgiving Meal Kits to South Phoenix Families
Assistory Outreach Services reached a milestone at Holiday Assist 2025, distributing 400 turkeys, grocery bags, and cases of water to South Phoenix families. Supported by Spinato’s Pizzeria, Niagara, Walmart, and Republic Services, the event continues its mission to help families enjoy a complete Thanksgiving meal.
Holiday Assist 2025: Assistory Outreach Services Provides 400 Thanksgiving Meal Kits to South Phoenix Families
Assistory Outreach Services, led by President and CEO Jon Taylor, celebrated a major milestone at this year’s Holiday Assist event that was held on November 21, 2025, which was its third year serving the South Phoenix community with free Thanksgiving meal supplies. What started as a neighborhood-centered effort has grown into a vital annual tradition that brings relief to families facing financial challenges during the holidays.
Held at South Pointe, the 2025 Holiday Assist event successfully provided 400 families with everything needed to prepare a full Thanksgiving meal. Volunteers and corporate partners came together to ensure each family left with a complete set of essentials including:
1 turkey
1 grocery bag packed with canned goods and side dish ingredients
1 case of bottled water, provided through a generous donation from Niagara
“We did it, South Pointe. We gave out 400 turkeys, 400 grocery bags, and 400 cases of water. Our goal was to give kids and their families what they needed for a Thanksgiving meal. The mission in year three was accomplished.”
Community Partnerships That Powered the Event
This year’s Holiday Assist was strengthened by a coalition of local organizations and businesses dedicated to giving back:
Spinato’s showed up in force with volunteers who helped pack and distribute meals. Their team worked side-by-side with Assistory Outreach to ensure every family received their supplies with dignity and care.
Both organizations offered volunteers and logistical support, contributing to the smooth delivery of the large-scale distribution.
Media Spotlight
The event drew local media attention, including coverage from NBC 12 News Phoenix, which highlighted Assistory Outreach’s continued growth and community-first mission.
A Growing Tradition of Giving
The success of Holiday Assist 2025 underscores Assistory Outreach Services’ commitment to uplifting families in tough economic times. With the help of sponsors and volunteers, Jon Taylor’s team continues to demonstrate that community, compassion, and collaboration are powerful tools for change.
“Our goal was to give kids and their families what they needed for a Thanksgiving meal.” — Jon Taylor
“The mission in year three was accomplished.”
Want to support Holiday Assist or volunteer at future events?
Discover inspiring stories of changemakers making a positive impact. Explore videos and articles of people tackling today’s biggest challenges with action and hope. Visit: https://stmdailynews.com/stories-of-change/
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