Lifestyle
Self-forgiveness is more than self-comfort − a philosopher explains
Self-forgiveness requires confronting negative emotions, acknowledging wrongdoing, and is essential for moral growth and healthier relationships.
Last Updated on March 7, 2026 by Daily News Staff
Mordechai Gordon, Quinnipiac University
As the Jewish High Holidays approach, which begin with Rosh Hashanah and continue with Yom Kippur, the theme of forgiveness keeps coming to my mind.
The 10 days from Rosh Hashanah to Yom Kippur are referred to in the Jewish tradition as the days of repentance, or the days of awe. During this period, Jews who observe the holidays implore God to respond to their sins with mercy, while also requesting forgiveness from anyone those individuals may have wronged in the past year.
Most conversations about forgiveness focus on the meaning and value of forgiving others. Douglas Stewart, a philosopher of education who has researched forgiveness extensively, writes that to forgive implies a willingness to let go of our negative emotions or hard feelings and to adopt in their place a more generous and compassionate attitude toward our wrongdoers.
Other philosophers have pointed out that the benefits of forgiveness include overcoming resentment, restoring relationships and setting a wrong to rest in the past – without vengeance. As such, to forgive should be considered morally valuable and admirable.
But what about self-forgiveness? Is it morally valuable, or just something we do to make ourselves feel better? And what is self-forgiveness, anyway?
As a philosopher of education, some of my own research has wrestled with these questions.
Defining self-forgiveness
Self-forgiveness means managing to work through painful feelings such as guilt, shame and deep disappointment with ourselves. It entails transforming negative attitudes, such as contempt, anger and shame, into more positive emotions such as respect and humility.
It is important to recognize, however, that a wrongdoer cannot simply reject shame: They must confront it. Moral philosophers such as Byron Williston assert that people who have deeply wronged others, such as betraying a loved one, need to experience shame and take responsibility for their actions – such as asking for forgiveness. Otherwise, an attempt at self-forgiveness is not likely to be meaningful.
Finally, we need to keep in mind that self-forgiveness does not imply someone has extinguished all the negative feelings directed at themselves or is done with self-reproach. This would amount to an impossible goal.
Rather, as philosopher Robin Dillon pointed out, self-forgiveness suggests that someone is no longer being consumed or overwhelmed by those negative feelings. In short, it is possible to forgive ourselves and still view ourselves with a demanding and critical eye.
Moral development
Getting there, though, is not easy. Self-forgiveness entails working through a rigorous process of coming to terms with wrongdoing.
According to ethicist Margaret Holmgren, that process includes at least four steps: acknowledging that what we did was wrong; coming to terms with why it was wrong; allowing ourselves to experience grief and self-resentment at having injured another person; and, finally, making a genuine effort to correct the attitudes that led to the harmful act and making amends to the victim.
In other words, confronting negative emotions, attitudes and patterns is essential prior to attempting to restore relationships with others. Only once we are able to relax the preoccupation with guilt and shame, and to genuinely forgive ourselves, can we meaningfully contribute to relationships as liberated and equal partners – especially in ongoing ones, such as with family and friends.
Of course, there are cases in which the offense is so vast, such as genocide, that no individual can make full restitution or provide an adequate apology for the wrong.
There are other times when an apology is impossible. Perhaps victims are dead; perhaps a direct apology would retraumatize them or do more harm than good.
In those cases, I would argue, an offender can still attempt to work toward self-forgiveness – acknowledging not only the victim’s intrinsic worth but their own, regardless of their ability to make amends. This in itself is moral growth: appreciating that neither is a mere object that can be manipulated or abused.
The take-home point, I would argue, is that going through the process of self-forgiveness is morally beneficial. It can not only liberate people who tend to reproach themselves incessantly, but it can enhance their ability to relate ethically toward others – to acknowledge wrongdoing, while simultaneously affirming their own value.
Most people have experienced at least one situation in which they inflicted pain on someone else and recognized that their words or actions caused harm. In such situations, we also often feel ashamed of ourselves and attempt to apologize or make amends.
Yet I hope that during this High Holiday season we keep in mind that self-forgiveness should also be considered essential. If moral development means a process in which our self-awareness and character mature, then acknowledging wrongdoing and experiencing shame, followed by self-forgiveness, are indispensable for that process.
Mordechai Gordon, Professor of Education, Quinnipiac University
This article is republished from The Conversation under a Creative Commons license. Read the original article.
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health and wellness
Zepbound Linked to Lower Healthcare Costs in Adults 55+ With Obesity, Real-World Study Suggests
A new real-world study of adults over age 55 with overweight or obesity found that sustained use of Zepbound (tirzepatide) for weight management was associated with lower healthcare costs over time compared with similar adults who were not treated. Eli Lilly and Company said the findings were driven in part by lower rates of hospital admissions and emergency department visits, and were published in Diabetes, Obesity and Metabolism.
What the study found
According to Lilly, researchers estimated healthcare cost differences over time (excluding the cost of Zepbound itself) using two established analytic methods. Across both approaches, monthly healthcare costs were lower, on average, among older adults who stayed on Zepbound.
Key estimates reported in the release include:
- At six months: costs were up to 15% lower (up to $181 per patient, per month).
- At 12 months: the estimated difference widened to as much as $607 per patient, per month, reflecting up to 38% lower costs than those not treated (estimates varied by model).
In the primary analysis, adults over 55 treated with Zepbound had lower rates of hospital admissions and emergency department visits across every follow-up period, along with numerically higher rates of routine outpatient and office visitsa pattern the company said was consistent with greater engagement in routine care.
Why Medicare is part of the conversation
Lilly said the cost findings may be relevant for older adults, including those in Medicares GLP-1 Bridge program. The company noted that beginning at six months, estimated healthcare savings nearly covered the programs monthly treatment cost of $195 per patient, per month, and by 12 months the estimated savings exceeded the reported monthly treatment cost.
Its important to note the release also emphasizes a limitation: claims data do not capture Zepbounds net price, and the study excluded the cost of Zepbound from total treatment costs. That means the reported differences reflect potential savings elsewhere in care that could offset treatment costs, not the full net cost impact.
Who was included in the analysis
The retrospective observational cohort study used Komodos Healthcare Map, a database of de-identified claims data from more than 330 million individuals enrolled in U.S. healthcare plans. The analysis included 15,843 adults over age 55 (mean age 64.5) with obesity or overweight plus at least one obesity-related complication who initiated Zepbound between November 2023 and September 2025. Each Zepbound user was matched 1:1 with a control participant who met the same eligibility criteria but did not initiate GLP-1 or GIP/GLP-1 receptor agonist medication.
What Zepbound is
Zepbound (tirzepatide) is a dual GIP and GLP-1 receptor agonist indicated for adults with obesity, or some adults with overweight who also have at least one weight-related medical problem, to lose weight and keep it off. Lilly also noted Zepbound is FDA-approved to treat adults with moderate-to-severe obstructive sleep apnea and obesity, and should be used alongside a reduced-calorie diet and increased physical activity.
Safety summary (high level)
The release includes an indications and safety summary with warnings. Among other risks, Lilly notes Zepbound carries a warning about thyroid tumors, including thyroid cancer, and may cause serious side effects such as severe stomach problems, dehydration leading to kidney problems, gallbladder problems, pancreatitis, serious allergic reactions, and low blood sugar (especially when used with certain diabetes medicines). Patients should talk with a healthcare provider about risks and whether the medication is appropriate for them.
Related Links
- Zepbound (official product site): https://zepbound.lilly.com/
- Lilly newsroom: https://www.lilly.com/news
- Journal page (publisher hub): https://dom-pubs.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/journal/14631326
- Medicare (official): https://www.medicare.gov/
- FDA MedWatch (side effect reporting): https://www.fda.gov/medwatch
Source
- PRNewswire / Eli Lilly and Company press release (Aug. 26, 2026): Zepbound linked to lower healthcare costs in adults over age 55 with obesity according to a real-world study
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(Feature Impact) When it comes to stroke, time matters. Recognizing the warning signs and calling 911 quickly can help with receiving time-sensitive, life-saving treatment. Recovery should begin early, too.
Having a stroke can divide life into a stark before and after, affecting many aspects of daily life. While it’s easy to focus on the things a stroke can take away, it’s important to remember there’s life after stroke. Recovery isn’t just about relearning skills. It’s about adapting to new challenges, finding purpose in a different reality and continuing to move forward.
Navigating the aftermath of a stroke means balancing short-term and long-term plans. Once medically stable, rehabilitation should ideally begin within 48 hours, according to the 2026 Guideline for Adult Stroke Rehabilitation and Recovery from the American Stroke Association. Recovery doesn’t have a fixed end. Meaningful progress can continue for months or years after survivors leave the hospital or complete formal therapy.
“Stroke rehabilitation is complicated,” said Lorie Gage Richards, Ph.D., FAHA, volunteer chair of the new guideline, associate professor at the University of Utah and an occupational therapist. “Each person faces a different set of challenges and care should be personalized to fit each person’s needs. The goal is to help individuals gain as much independence as possible to perform everyday activities while improving their overall quality of life.”
Approximately 800,000 people have a stroke each year in the U.S, according to the American Heart Association’s 2026 Heart Disease and Stroke Statistics. Whether you’re navigating recovery yourself or supporting someone you love, connecting with a coordinated healthcare team is an important first step. Ask about a comprehensive assessment, develop a rehabilitation plan based on what matters to you and set small, achievable goals throughout recovery.
Building Skills and Independence
After a stroke, familiar parts of a daily routine may take more effort or require a new approach. A rehabilitation team can assess how stroke has affected movement, communication, thinking, vision, hearing and other abilities then develop a plan based on individual needs and goals.
Recovery doesn’t look the same for everyone. For one person, a meaningful goal may be dressing independently. For others, it could be returning to work, driving safely or participating in favorite activities. Start with manageable goals, evaluate progress and reassess the plan as needs change.
Understanding the Invisible Impacts
Some of the most challenging parts of recovery may be the ones others can’t see. For instance, you might lose confidence or sense of identity, have trouble concentrating or experience anxiety or depression. Along with mental and emotional changes, you may notice ongoing physical symptoms like pain, difficulty sleeping, changes in sexual function or difficulty with bladder control.
Invisible challenges don’t have to stay that way. Ask your healthcare team to assess your physical and emotional health, including depression and anxiety, during the hospital stay and throughout recovery. Speaking up about new or changing symptoms can help identify appropriate treatment and support.
Navigating Changing Relationships
When you have a stroke, your life isn’t the only one that changes. A partner, parent or friend may suddenly take on new responsibilities, making honest conversations about support especially important.
Family responsibilities may also look different. Parenting young children, supporting loved ones or balancing work and family can bring new challenges during recovery. Give yourself permission to slow down, accept care and connect with the people who matter most.
Finding Purpose and Redefining Success
Recreation, hobbies, social connections and other meaningful activities are an important part of recovery and can help people regain confidence, participate in their communities and improve quality of life. That may mean returning to music, art, exercise or time with friends. It could also mean modifying favorite activities, discovering new interests or connecting with a support group.
Life after stroke may look different, but different doesn’t mean less meaningful. Recovery isn’t measured by how closely someone returns to who they were before. It’s about finding new ways to pursue what matters most and continuing to move forward.
Learn more about recognizing stroke, preparing for rehabilitation and adjusting to life after stroke by visiting Stroke.org.
Photos courtesy of Shutterstock
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Health
5 Babyproofing Tips for Baby Safety Month
Babyproofing is about anticipating those discoveries before little ones make them. In honor of National Baby Safety Month, consider these tips you can use to make your home safer all year round.
5 Babyproofing Tips for Baby Safety Month
(Feature Impact) Outsmarting a baby can be harder than it sounds – especially when it comes to transforming your home into a safe place for them to explore. Through their eyes, a coffee table becomes a climbing opportunity, a dangling phone charger looks like a teething toy and a cabinet of cleaning supplies could be an exciting travel destination.
Babyproofing is about anticipating those discoveries before little ones make them. In honor of National Baby Safety Month, consider these tips to make your home safer all year round.
Install Gates and Doorknob Covers
Crawling babies and stairs are a bad combination. Make sure the two never have the chance to meet by securely installing safety gates at the top and bottom of staircases to thwart young explorers. Gates or doorknob covers can also block access to other rooms and areas you’d prefer to keep off limits, like kitchens, bathrooms and laundry areas.
Use Safety Latches Wisely
Cabinets and drawers can contain a myriad of dangerous items, from cleaning products to sharp objects and medications. Even if you have rooms gated off, treat safety latches and locked storage receptacles as a second line of defense to make sure babies and toddlers can’t rummage where they shouldn’t.
Stress-Test Furniture
As babies and toddlers transition from crawling to walking, they often try using furniture to pull themselves up. Tall or unstable objects like TV stands, small tables and bookshelves can tip over if they aren’t properly secured. Try giving these objects a shake to see whether they’re easily moveable or wobbly; if so, anchor them to the floor or wall when possible. While you’re at it, check for sharp corners at the right height to bonk little heads and cover them with softer edge protectors.
Cover Outlets and Stow Cords
Electrical outlets can be tempting targets for curious fingers. Outfit them with covers or plastic safety caps, especially if you don’t already have tamper-resistant receptacles with built-in mechanisms to block foreign objects from entering the slots. As you’re going about your outlet audit, pay attention to cords as well. When possible, tuck them away or secure them with cord organizing systems, and block access to objects like lamps where cords can be used for tugging and toppling.
See the World at Their Level
Although it might feel silly, one of the best ways to spot hazards around your home is to scout for them from a baby’s perspective. Try getting as close to the floor as you can then look around each room for anything that could interest a young child and pose potential danger. In particular, keep an eye out for small objects that could become choking hazards, like dropped coins, batteries or loose toy pieces.
As children grow, so do the needs of your space. Visit eLivingtoday.com for more ideas on designing your home to fit your family.
Photo courtesy of Unsplash
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